A Short Love Story by Monte R. Anderson

I thought I posted this story already but I guess I didn’t. Here it is.

True Love is Ageless, but Sex…

By Monte R. Anderson

Judy was impressed as she walked into the restaurant Chris choose for their date. He certainly has good taste, she thought. She wasn’t sure if he was ready for what she was going to tell him, but she had made up her mind to do it. Chris stood by and waited for the hostess to help Judy with her chair. He’s also a gentleman. That’s so rare these days.

“This seems like a nice restaurant. Do you eat here often?” Judy asked.

Chris folded his napkin and placed it on his lap. “I ate here maybe twice on business, but it was lunch, not diner. I thought the food was excellent.”

The server arrived and after explaining the evening’s specials, asked if they would like to order drinks. Chris asked, “Shall I order the wine for us or would you prefer?”

Judy smiled. “I think I would like some Champaign if you don’t mind. I feel like celebrating.”

Chris raised his eyebrows. “And what are we celebrating?”

“I’ll get to that. Go ahead and order.”

After asking a couple of question, Chris order two glasses of Champaign and the appetizer special: stuffed mushrooms. They both started reading the menu.

“Would you like me to order for both of us? I hear the prime rib is to die for.”

“Okay, but make mine petit. I probably won’t be able to finish it.”

The server returned with their glasses of Champaign and took their orders.

Chris raised his glass. “Here’s to us then.” They clicked glasses. “Now what are we celebrating?”

Judy smiled and placed her napkin on her lap. “We’re celebrating us, you could say. Your toast was spot on. This is our third date. You know what they say.”

Chris shook his head. “No, what do they say?”

Judy lowered her voice and leaned forward. “They say that if you like someone then you should sleep with him by the third date. I really enjoy your company and I think we should take our relation to the next level. I want to sleep with you, Chris Andrew.”

Chris leaned back in his chair. “Oh, wow. I didn’t see that coming. Who makes these rules? I mean, yes, I thought about it, but I didn’t want to push it. Yes. Yes. I really like you, and I would like that. I mean raising our relationship to the next level.”

Judy chuckled. “Well we’re not exactly like a couple of twenty-year olds who can just jump into bed anytime. We’re in our seventies for God’s sake. There are logistics to consider. I think we should discuss it.”

“Oh. Logistics.” Chris looked around the dining room. “You mean right here? Now?”

Judy laughed. “Of course. No one can hear us. I’ve given this a lot of thought, and I think we should do it tonight—right after diner. If you don’t mind, I’d like to have you sleep over at my place. It would be easier for me. I have all my meds, make up, and clothes there. I’ll feel more comfortable there.”

“Yes, of course. That’s fine with me. If fact, for breakfast I’ll make my famous pancakes. We’ll have breakfast in bed.”

Judy chuckled. “I haven’t had breakfast in bed in years. In fact, I can’t remember the last time a man cooked for me. That sounds promising, but I’m a diabetic. Pancakes raise my blood sugar levels.”

“Okay. Then I’ll make an omelet with bacon and toast.”

Judy started to say something but saw the server approaching with their appetizer. She waited until he was out of hearing range.

Judy shook her head. “Skip the bacon. If I eat the prime rib, that’ll be enough meat for me to last a week.”

“An omelet with toast it is.” He raised his glass again. “Here’s to a great night and breakfast in bed.” They clicked glasses. “We’ll drive over to my place after this so I can pick up my meds and a change of clothes. Then we’ll stop to buy eggs and bread.”

“And condoms,” added Judy.

“What?”

“Do you have condoms?”

“Well, no. I guess we’ll have to buy some.”

“No, that’s okay. I have some.”

Chris raised one eyebrow. “You do?”

Judy cocked her head to one side. “We agreed not to mention our previous relationships, remember? Yes, I have condoms. I like to be prepared.” Judy grinned. “I have large, will that fit?”

Christ nodded his head. “It’ll be a tight squeeze, but it may work.”

Judy nearly spit out her mouth full of Champaign as she laughed. “You crack me up. I think I enjoy your sense of humor best of all. I haven’t laughed this much as I have on these dates with you.”

“If you thought that was funny, wait until you see my performance in bed.”

Judy laughed again. “You said last week that you had some type of heart condition. Has your doctor cleared you for sex?”

Chris smiled. “Oh, yeah. In fact, he encourages it. He gave me Viagra. I take a quarter tablet every day.”

“You do? Every day? Why so little?”

“Well, I just need enough so I don’t pee on my shoes.”

Judy laughed and shook her head. “You’re terrible. Do you have ED? Did you bring some?”

“I have a problem with ED. Nothing terrible, just typical old age. I’ll take a pill when we get to my place. How about you? Is your doctor okay with this?”

“Well, I didn’t specially ask her about tonight, but yeah, I’m okay. I have a problem with dryness, but she gave me a cream for that.”

Chris started to say something but stopped when the server arrived with their prime rib. They ordered another glass of Champaign. Chris cut a piece of prime rib and ate it. “Hmmmm. That’s good. While we’re talking about medical condition, I should tell you that I have sleep apnea. I’ll have to bring my breathing machine.”

“That’s fine. Do you need distilled water for that?”

“For one night, regular water won’t hurt the machine.”

Judy smiled coyly. “Or two… I guess I should tell you that I snore. If it bothers you, just wake me and tell me to turn on my side.”

“It won’t bother me. Once I take out my hearing aids, I won’t hear a thing.”

Judy laughed. “We seems so compatible, don’t we?” She raised her glass and took a sip. Chris sipped his drink too. For a few moments, they sat quietly enjoying their meal. Judy broke the silence, “Chris, I don’t know what your expectations are, but I have arthritis. My not as flexible as I once was. I can’t do some things”

“Judy, when we started this evening, my expectations were to have a good meal in the company of an exciting and beautiful woman and maybe go out for some ice cream afterwards. I know a great place that serves the best ice cream. Besides, I have a bad back. We won’t be doing anything too strenuous. In fact, I would prefer if you were on top.”

“Oh, I like the top. Thank you.”

They continued to eat. Finally, Chris spoke up. “I should warn you that sometimes one of my ex-wives may call me.”

“One? How many ex-wives do you have?”

Chris raised one eyebrow and Judy backed down.

“Sorry. It just slipped out. Why does she call?”

Chris sat back. “To answer your question, I have two ex-wives, but only the first one feels the need to call me at odd hours. I think she’s just insecure. My second ex-wife hates my guts and would never call.” Chris sat straight up. “I almost forgot. I have to call my neighbor across the hall. He’ll have to take care of my dog.”

“Oh. You never mentioned a dog. Will he be okay with your neighbor?”

“Yeah, we cover for each other all the time, not a problem.”

“Well, I failed to mention that I have a cat. I hope you aren’t allergic.”

“No, no. I have no allergies.”

Judy sat still for a moment and then sighed.

Chris put down his fork. “What is it. What are you thinking?”

Judy shook her head. “Nothing really. There just seems to be a lot of logistics.”

“Tell me what you’re thinking. It’s okay. We’re in this together. Are you having second thoughts?”

Judy nodded her head. “Yeah, I guess. I’m trying to decide if I’m horny enough to go through with this.”

Chris smiled and placed his hand over Judy’s hand. “What do you say we go out for ice cream after diner, and then call it a night?”

Judy smiled. “That sounds like a good plan.”

THE END

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2 Comments

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  1. Really funny: I’m 74 and can feel the pain and the humor. Nicely done. I’ll share it with my friends with your permission.

    Like

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