More Secret US Government Areas Disclosed

#Area 51 is a remote detachment of Edwards Air Force Base, 83miles north-northwest of #Las Vegas in #Nevada. The base’s primary purpose is top secret; however, it most likely supports development and testing of aircraft and weapons systems. It also houses alleged unidentified flying objects (#UFOs) that crashed nearby. Rumors persist that visiting aliens live in the barracks. Okay, you all knew that much.

Did you ever wonder about the other areas like Area 50, Area 49, and Area 52, etc.? Those areas are top secret too. You may wonder how I know that. Well, have you ever heard of them? No? There you go. I was able to obtain a top-secret list of those top-secret areas from a top-secret confidential source. I won’t bore you with the entire list. I will just name a few:

Area 13. Locally called “Obama-scare,” Area 13 is the location where the web site for the new Affordable Healthcare Act was developed.

Area 007. This area houses all the data that is gathered by the #CIA and #NSA. It is affectionately referred to as Home of the SS (Super Snoopers). One entire building is devoted just to telephone conversations. Another has all the e-mails you thought disappeared into a cyber black hole. Rumor has it that Hillary Clinton is a consultant for the area.

Area EZ1040. It’s at this area where all the tax codes are taken and revised to be impossible to understand.

Area 69. This area is devoted to teaching politicians how to avoid sex scandals. Eliot Spitzer is a recent drop out. Anthony #Weiner is a graduate.

Area Mary Jane. This is where the government grows high quality #marijuana for politicians. Clients include the ex-Mayor of #Toronto, Rob Ford, ex-Mayor of San Diego.

Area IT. This area has been in the news recently, and may have blown its cover. The area is used strictly for Intensive Therapy (IT). It contains an 18-hole golf course, a swimming pool and tennis courts. Anthony Weiner, Bob #Filner and others graduated from the one-week course. Many graduates say that the therapy has improved their golf handicap by as much a 10 strokes.

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  1. I am a Super Snooper working in Area 007. Read my reports on my Agent 54 blog.

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