The Real Reasons You’re Not Getting Promoted

I read with interest an article from The Motley Fool by Maurie Backman, “10 Reasons You’re Not Getting Promoted.” The ten reasons included: a negative attitude, showing up late or leaving early, using vulgar or inappropriate language, too many sick days, gossiping, wasting time on social media, being messy, wasting time chatting with coworkers and taking too many personal calls. Sometimes you can guess the reason as when the boss’ son gets promoted over you. The article missed the real reasons you aren’t getting that big promotion. Here they are:

  1. Your fraternity or sorority just made the news for some stupid stunt.
  2. Your boss just discovered that funny video of you drunk and falling into a wedding cake.
  3. HR discovered that you didn’t actually graduate form Trump University.
  4. The boss’ secretary showed HR the sext message you sent her.
  5. You asked the boss for a date.
  6. You brought your AK47 to work.
  7. You won’t use the same drug dealer that the rest of the office uses.
  8. You used the copy machine for pornography without permission.
  9. HR discovered that hilarious video of the office party you posted on Youtube.
  10. You showed too much interest in the boss’ son/daughter
  11. You said the boss’ idea was stupid.

Of course, you may never know the truth. All you can do is to give your very best effort and kiss up to the boss.

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